| 1. You're committed to your dreadlocks, even if you ever go bald. |
That's dildos. |
|
Totally metal!! |
| 2. You are severely allergic to cilantro. |
That's dildos. |
|
Totally metal!! |
| 3. You earned your GED at Carpathian Forest High. |
That's dildos. |
|
Totally metal!! |
| 4. You sometimes have nightmares that you are employed at Dimmu Burger. |
That's dildos. |
|
Totally metal!! |
| 5. You believe that adult teeth will grow back because baby teeth do. |
That's dildos. |
|
Totally metal!! |
| 6. Yous practices yours guitars in the hot tub. |
That's dildos. |
|
Totally metal!! |
| 7. In high school, you excelled only in frog dissection and football. |
That's dildos. |
|
Totally metal!! |
| 8. You like to urinate in inappropriate places. |
That's dildos. |
|
Totally metal!! |
| 9. Your friends jokingly refer to you as 'Tonto'. |
That's dildos. |
|
Totally metal!! |
| 10. You collect Civil War memorabilia. |
That's dildos. |
|
Totally metal!! |
| 11. Your personality is child-like, innocent, and good-natured. |
That's dildos. |
|
Totally metal!! |
| 12. You once asked priest from the Church of Satan for revenge on Rachael Ray from the Food Network (in the form of her eyes falling out or her tits falling off) for unspecified reasons. |
That's dildos. |
|
Totally metal!! |
| 13. You have told a lawyer to go breathe under water. |
That's dildos. |
|
Totally metal!! |
| 14. "I hate you" is the highest compliment you can pay someone. |
That's dildos. |
|
Totally metal!! |
| 15. You used to be in a band called Snakes and Barrels. |
That's dildos. |
|
Totally metal!! |
| 16. You have encouraged someone to play his records backwards and kill himself. |
That's dildos. |
|
Totally metal!! |
| 17. You bought your grandfather an electric wheelchair at Gorgoroth's. |
That's dildos. |
|
Totally metal!! |
| 18. You are immune to the negative effects of drugs because you "grew up smoking government weed every day" as treatment for your "kiddie glaucoma." |
That's dildos. |
|
Totally metal!! |
| 19. Your hands are insured for ten billion dollars, one billion for each finger. |
That's dildos. |
|
Totally metal!! |
| 20. You can jam on your bass guitar using only your penis. |
That's dildos. |
|
Totally metal!! |
